Timewarp: 2021

Phew. 2020. The saying hindsight is 2020. I don’t think anyone (maybe) saw that coming. In any event, we’re beyond it. While 2021 is beginning as a continuation and may be even a little more surreal (e.g. WTF US?) I’m ready to get to work. On me. On my riding. On my writing. For those…

I’m Ready to Talk About It

As I typed the title I felt the tears welling up ready to spring out at any moment. I swallowed and typed the first sentence. Then the second. Now the third. September 26, 2019 I carried my heart home and let Carter run free over the rainbow bridge. These have been the toughest months I’ve…

Thoreau made it sound so easy

One of my favorite quotes is on my office wall for motivation: “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you’ve imagined.” Sounds lovely, right? Of course, Thoreau must have had a much simpler life or goal structure. Life gets in the way. Injuries (even though self-inflicted by the beast) sideline goals…

Negative Nodes and Good Margins! I call it a success!

Monday I had the little shithead of an M&M (aka TicTac) removed via lumpectomy and two nearby lymph nodes went along with it. I found out last night that it was, in fact, (see The journey of me and my little M&M) a Stage 1, Grade 1, 9 mm IDC and that the surgeon got good…

One week until my little M&M coming out party!

It’s been a whirlwind of a week with all my pre-op appointments falling on one day. I’ve read so much information I think my head is going to explode. I’m exactly one week and -56 minutes from my lumpectomy, sentinel node biopsy, and intraoperative radiation therapy — AKA My Little M&M Coming Out Party. I’m…

The journey of me and my little M&M

Last Monday (of course it was a Monday, right?) at 11:11 a.m. my life changed when I answered my doctor’s phone call. I heard “I have some bad news.” and things went a little blurry. Luckily, I snapped back into the call to also hear, “we caught it very early. Very early. It’s very small.”…

What’s good for the soul, is good for the saddle

I am a serial exercise fanatic. Well, maybe not fanatic but I have been known to start a program, stop a program, start a program. So, maybe I’m better coined as a serial exercise junkie? I’m not in great shape, I can admit it. I have years of neglecting my fitness piled up in my…

(First World) Problems of an Unemployed Dressage Rider

It’s been forever since I’ve blogged! Yikes, I’m sorry that I fell off the face of the earth! I really didn’t, but I’ve been super distracted because I’m trying to find a new job. I’m a director of marketing and took a voluntary severance from my job about a year ago – had a great…

Spring. Newness of beginnings

I’m quietly enjoying a fresh, new day and find myself full of optimism and positive thoughts. Maybe it’s the newly green grass or the emerging buds on the trees, but Spring always brings me a sense of energy that none of the other seasons do. Everywhere I look there is beauty emerging. Whether it’s the…

Dear Me – A Letter to My 16-Year-Old Self

Dear Me, I wanted to give you some advice – sage perhaps. This is some pretty serious stuff — and it’s exposing some of your deepest, darkest secrets. No worries — your true self will know that you’re strong enough to be this transparent. These are just the big ones… there are plenty of other…

A Wake Up Call

Ambition. It’s a strong word that I don’t hear often, anymore. Yet, it woke me out of a restful sleep this morning – ringing in my ears like an alarm clock. Rolling it around in my thoughts – saying it softly to myself – pondering the presence of it in an early morning. Why, I…

Pinch Me! I Must Have Been Dreaming!

I’m back home after a week in what some of us like to call – horse Disney – formally known as Wellington, FL. I know, I know. Many of you are now sneering at the screen or silently sneaking expletives my way for my ability to take that trip. Some may even leave the post…

I Didn’t Break My Horse!

Carter probably doesn’t know it, but I leave for Wellington, FL early this week. That is, if the winter storm that’s quickly approaching decides to move on before my flight. I’ve already taken advantage of my airline’s travel policy and moved my reservations one day forward, so here’s hoping Mother Nature knows I’d really like…

No more excuses

It’s been cold. It’s winter in Northern Illinois, so that is probably no surprise. Four days of down time due to the horrendous temperatures and weather. Even going to the barn was cut short a day due to the extreme colds. Luckily, my trainer/barn manager made sure that my boy and all the other horses…

Thankfulness. Appreciation. Love. Timeless.

As we near the season of tradition, giving thanks, and renewal, I was searching for some quotes about dressage that reflect where I am with my training with Carter right now and found a few that seem to capture it well. “The passionate pursuit of perfection by the obsessively imperfect.”  – unknown I’m not one…

Live the Questions

A good friend sent me a treasure he found in his late grandfather’s belongings that struck me right to the core when I read it. As I absorbed its meaning, I realized how grateful I am to have the opportunity to live my questions. So many days before I lived my expectations – trudging to…

True Confessions: I Cheated On My Horse

I cheated on my horse with another horse last week. There. I said it. I own it. And, I’m not sorry I did it. My boy is on a two week hiatus while we wait for some biopsies to heal and results to come back from the vet. (Thankfully, the biopsies came back non-malignant and…

Realizations of a 30-month-old Dressage Rider

I thought I’d take note of my recent revelations as I’m reflecting back on my journey. While it’s been short, compared, to most, I’m hopeful I’m not alone in my self-imposed issues as a dressage rider. I am my own worst critic “You looked great today!” says my trainer.  “Really? I think… were you in…

Anticipation. Yes. Anticipation.

If you’re a product of the 70s (or 60s) you likely remember that ketchup commercial and the Carly Simon song that accompanied it… Anticipation, Anticipation is making me wait. Well, anticipating I am! Carter and I will be making our First Level debut later this month! I wasn’t sure we were going to put all…

#RideAboveHate

Horse Junkies United has partnered with several organizations to bring a nasty practice to light and, hopefully, spread the support to end it!  Click here to read the HJU post http://horsejunkiesunited.com/?p=85113 Share. Believe. Support. End Bullying.

Bring it 2016!

I cannot believe I’m writing my 2015 recap. Didn’t the year just begin? They say time flies when you’re having fun (or when you get old), so I guess I’ll claim a little of both. The last year has been such a whirlwind for me after looking for a new job and starting one at…